Human Stories

walmart man

My body has grown accustomed to the harsh surface of the wall and the concrete, almost like it’s become a part of it. I can’t remember the first time that I sat and just watched. And I don’t remember what triggered it but just like that I was in my best suit, on the ground watching life pass me by.

The next time I decided that maybe something more comfortable would be preferable for my surroundings. I took my morning coffee with me and watched in amusement the hustle and bustle of everyone around me. Hurrying in high heels, trying to get a cab, spilling coffee all over the sidewalk and just looking plain frantic. And there I sat sipping my coffee.

The day after that it was scorching hot and I decided to make do without a shirt. The sun beat down on me and sweat trickled down my back. This is why I opted for something colder to drink – lemonade. This time I spread out my legs on the sidewalk and watched at the people trying to avoid them and just like that they became circus clowns moving about and hopping from place to place.

Days turned into weeks and I found my mornings more enjoyable just watching other people live their lives.

Alone

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My skin is being peeled off my body and not in the sun-burnt kind of way.

Its sharp and every contact is excruciatingly painful.

This is why I will my eyes to open.

It takes them time to adjust.

Too bright. Too hot.

Pain.

And then I know.

The cause of my misery.

I try my best to shield and swat.

But those damn birds are insistent.

And that is when I notice my surroundings.

Just like that I’m afraid to ask, “Where the hell am I?”

A dozen thoughts race through my head that make it spin.

I pinch my raw skin just to see if it were a dream but nothing changes.

Nowhere in sight do I see any semblance of life.

The sweat trickles down every part of my body and the saltiness too feels foreign. I try to rationalize and retrace my steps but just like that I have no steps to trace. No indication of a past life.

This place of scorching heat where every step felt like walking in a furnace. Where the wind did a poor job in cooling the air around and instead blew angry, hot gusts of dust in the face. This place so barren that no life could ever withstand it.

 

The birds are circling above me waiting for the moment that I fall and faint. Thanks for the vote of confidence.

I start considering the many possibilities. Could this be some kind of joke? Albeit it lacked any sense of humor. Revenge? But I couldn’t recall any enemies. Hell, I couldn’t recall anything. Reality TV? Get a kick out of watching other people suffer.

It’s not too long before the tears start falling and I’m a hysterical mess. Yeah, don’t put me in such situations. I fall to my knees and beat the ground in frustration.

Stop crying.

You need to preserve every ounce of water.

And just like that I stop.

Get up.

Walk.

My body has a mind of its own.

Rain

Large

Watch the clouds cry out

Cold drops of magic

Onto my skin

Trickling down

The length of my body

As I shiver

Under my wet clothes

And adjust myself

To the warmth

In the air around me

Feeding off the energy

Of everything about me

And I watch them

Come alive

Under the fresh rain

Sprout buds of hope

Bloom into a kaleidoscope

Of colours

And when the clouds

Stop

All that remains

Is a glint

Reminding us

Of the beauty

That comes with washing away

Our impurities

And embracing ourselves

Whole

Spread my wings and soar towards the sky.

birds

I’ve always wanted to fly.

Spread my wings and soar towards the sky.

They said it could never be done.

What they failed to understand though was that when you challenge me, I tend to not stop till I deliver.

Call it determination, stubbornness or perseverance.

But I have come to acknowledge that life tends to challenge us.

And throw obstacles our way.

All so that we move on from the easy and make room for the difficult.

Learn and grow at the same time.

I don’t quite know why we run from challenges though or hide at the sight of them.

Sometimes running seems okay.

And cowering seems safe.

In the long run, however, I’m not quite sure.

I’ve imagined countless instances of running away.

Where I just pack my bags and leave.

But I think I take those visions in the wrong contexts.

Because when I think of getting up and leaving, it is more for an adventure than a haven.

Maybe that adventure lies in my tomorrow.

And my today consists of facing hardships head on.

Rather than head down.

So.

It is 11:11 right now.

Part of me believes in the magic of it all.

The power it holds to make my wishes come true.

So I’ll close my eyes, hold my breath and make a wish.

To someday spread my wings and soar towards the sky.

I Forgive You…

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Dear Me,

I forgive you. For what it’s worth.

I forgive you for hiding behind written words. Because that is the only place where you can be honest. About yourself and everyone else. Fearing the power they hold.

I forgive you for making the wrong choices and leaping before looking. I forgive you for hurting those around with unintentional unkind words. I forgive you.

I forgive you for looking the other way. And for not letting your voice be heard. I forgive you for being insensitive and hiding behind a façade.

I forgive you for closing of your heart. And taking cautionary steps towards friendships. I forgive you for keeping it all in when there was so much to be said.

Tomorrow, I’ll forgive you some more.

I will forgive you for the wrong decisions. So, that you can learn and think a hundred times before making them again. Only you will make them again. And I will forgive you again.

I will forgive you for tearing off the heart on your sleeve and shoving it in your freezer. Preserving it for a warm day. When in reality, you need it now more than ever. I will forgive the tinge of red that colours your cheeks when you become shy and cower in your cocoon. Keeping everyone at arm’s length. ‘Beware of the girl who is too scared to open up.’

I will forgive you for always wanting to run away. Because it seems easier.

I will forgive you.

Love, Me

Foreplay

The heat radiates
Of your body
I blush involuntarily

I try to cover myself
Exposed and shy
Naked

You take long strides
Wanting to finish the distance between us
So no space separates us

And then you’re slowly touching
Leaving burning kisses all over
Scorching me with your touch

Sensuously
You wrap yourself around me
And i am consumed by your presence

You start peeling away the layers
Not fast enough
It hurts because it takes too long

Too much skin
A little pain
And then nothing

I fall to the ground
Taking you along with me
Just to get more comfortable

Breathing becomes difficult
It gets in the way
And i cling to you till i need you no more

Guess, what could i possibly be talking about here?